No More New Year Resolutions – Try Intentions Instead

Here we are again. January. The cold, dark belly of winter.

And yet everywhere around us there’s this frantic energy demanding we reinvent ourselves, smash goals, and become entirely new people.

No wonder so many New Year resolutions crash and burn before the month is out.

It’s a drum I beat regularly – January is probably the worst time to launch ourselves into ambitious new regimes. In Chinese Medicine, winter is the season of the Water element, characterised by stillness, reflection, and going inward. It’s about rest, restoration, and paring back to the essentials.

The days are short, cold, and dark. Many of us are dealing with lower energy levels, possibly Seasonal Affective Disorder, less sunlight, reduced social connection. Our usual support systems feel thinner in January – everyone’s skint after Christmas, hiding indoors, battling the winter blues. It’s hardly the optimal conditions for radical transformation.

And yet, the cultural pressure is enormous. New year, new you. Fresh start. Clean slate. All that nonsense.

I hate New Year Resolutions – all gritted teeth, self-annihilation, and setting yourself up for failure. My coaching is about empowering people to make aligned changes that feel sustainable and nourishing, not punishing (oh, and that last, rather than short term fixes which disappear within months, even weeks).

But here’s the thing – I do think it’s important to take stock. To think about the direction you want to take next. To tune into what your heart actually desires, rather than what you think you should want.

And winter, with all its inward, reflective energy, is actually perfect for this. Not for forcing change, but for setting intentions. For looking deep within and listening to your internal wisdom.

This is why I love the intention-setting process inspired by Deb Dana, a wise and warm teacher who’s influenced my work profoundly. I’ve been using (and sharing) this approach for a few years now and it keeps delivering insights that feel true and generative rather than punishing.

Instead of resolutions, ask yourself these three questions:

What would I like to:

Simple, isn’t it? And yet so much kinder and more generative than many resolutions out there.

I’m going to share mine here too – I think it’s important to model the honest process of this work and it always helps with clarity and accountability to write them down and share (drop me an email with yours if if you want that too).

What I want to leave behind in 2025:
Caution and playing it safe: Particularly around the chronic-fatigue type issues I’ve been managing for many years. Pacing is important to my health but can create a tricky balancing act – overdoing it can cause symptoms, but that can also mean a tendency to over-edit; perhaps overprotect.  I’ll be using my regulation tools to help signal safety to my system as I continue to stretch my capacity zones in all areas of my life (I always manage my work commitments but sometimes that doesn’t leave much else in the tank!).

What I want to bring with me into 2026:
My Samaritans volunteering: This has been a real treasure to me in 2025 – something that nourishes me on so many levels.  And if I say so myself, I’m good at it.  It feels like “Zone of Genius” stuff for me (the Zone of Genius is where the great stuff happens – the things that give you passion, joy, inspiration, challenge and dedication. It’s where you tap into innate skills and traits, and where you harness your uniqueness and really excel.  Check out one of my old blogs about the “zones” – they can be really useful).

What I want to invite in anew for 2026:
Adventure: This is one of my core values and perhaps has been a little neglected in recent years.  My carefree youth was spent solo travelling the world, but that doesn’t happen so much these days!  But adventure comes in many forms, and I’m going to be making the effort to explore new places and try new things, even on a micro or local level.

So now I’m inviting you to try this. Find a quiet moment – make yourself a cuppa, light a candle if that’s your thing, put on some favourite tunes, and find a cosy corner.  Create support and gentleness around the process and think about the questions for 2026.

Write down what comes. Don’t overthink it. Trust what emerges.

And if what you long for feels beyond you right now, or you can’t seem to make it happen, or make it last – well, that’s exactly what I can help with.

Book a free exploratory chat – no obligation, no hard sell, just a chance to try some coaching, ask questions, and check if we’d work well together.

Here’s to a 2026 that feels aligned, nourishing, and true to who you really are.