perfectionism Archives - emmabyers.co.uk

Is Perfectionism a Problem? (#2 Perfectionism Series)
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Is Perfectionism a Problem? (#2 Perfectionism Series)

Perfectionism

Is Perfectionism a Problem? (#2 Perfectionism Series)

Some of the problems your perfectionism might be causing I’m often asked “is perfectionism is problem?”. My answer is yes, but it can be a hard sell sometimes to my perfectionist clients. Many associate perfectionism with high standards, achieving new heights, exceptionalism, ambition, success…The list goes on with many things we value highly in our society. (BTW if you wondering if you are a perfectionist, check out my first blog in this series here.) But the impact of [...]

Emma Byers2025-06-13T10:00:48+00:0013 June 2025|Categories: Perfectionism|Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, am i a perfectionist, black and white thinking, dichotomous thinking, hard on self, never good enough, not good enough, perfectionism, perfectionist, Procrastination, vicious inner critic|Comments Off

Am I A Perfectionist? (#1 Perfectionism Series)
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Am I A Perfectionist? (#1 Perfectionism Series)

Perfectionism

Am I A Perfectionist? (#1 Perfectionism Series)

Some signs that you might be a perfectionist - and why it's getting in your way Am I a perfectionist? Me? No. I'm not good enough...I don't work hard enough...I'm not organised enough to be a perfectionist (hint - these phrases themselves suggest there's at least some perfectionism!)There's quite a lot of misunderstanding about what perfectionism is, and how it shows up. And even whether it's a bad thing or not. It's not a great term - we [...]

Emma Byers2025-06-13T08:54:48+00:0029 May 2025|Categories: Perfectionism|Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, am i a perfectionist, black and white thinking, dichotomous thinking, hard on self, never good enough, not good enough, perfectionism, perfectionist, Procrastination, vicious inner critic|Comments Off

Overcoming all-or-nothing thinking
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Overcoming all-or-nothing thinking

Black and White Thinking, Black and White Thinking, Perfectionism

Overcoming all-or-nothing thinking

Overcoming all-or-nothing, black and white thinking, or dichotomous thinking (they're all the same thing!) All-or-nothing thinking is a common theme in my coaching - I'll never be able to do this, if this doesn't work it's a failure, if I don't do x, it will have to be y... We all do it and it's not that big a deal occasionally, But when this becomes a consistent pattern, or mindset, it can really make things tough. What is all-or-nothing thinking?All-or-nothing [...]

Emma Byers2025-05-29T12:37:52+00:0029 May 2025|Categories: Black and White Thinking, Black and White Thinking, Perfectionism|Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, black and white thinking, dichotomous thinking, hard on self, never good enough, not good enough, perfectionism, vicious inner critic|Comments Off

Nourish or Numb?
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Nourish or Numb?

Procrastination, Stress, Stress and Anxiety

Nourish or Numb?

When you're stressed, do you nourish or numb? We often unconsciously use activities which soothe the autonomic nervous system (ANS). This is the non-conscious part of our brain and body that is responsible for our survival (on a basic level, it's the flight or fight response). These activities help us to come back towards regulation - a calmer, more conscious Ventral state where we can choose how we act rather than react. (BTW, I'm using the language of Polyvagal Theory [...]

Emma Byers2024-04-05T18:16:07+00:005 April 2024|Categories: Procrastination, Stress, Stress and Anxiety|Tags: anxiety, holistic life coaching, imposter syndrome, managing stress, motivitation, people pleasing, perfectionism, procrastinating, Procrastination, productivity tools, stress, stress and anxiety, trauma-informed coaching|Comments Off

Building Healthy Habits That Last: #3 Try Compassion Instead
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Building Healthy Habits That Last: #3 Try Compassion Instead

Habit formation, Procrastination

Building Healthy Habits That Last: #3 Try Compassion Instead

In a previous blog, I mentioned the biggest stumbling blocks I see for those struggling to put their plans into (consistent) action - going too big, too quickly, and only focusing on the goal; not celebrating the steps to get there. BTW this is part of a mini series of blogs about building healthy habits that last - you can see the other parts here and here... Another major stumbling block is how many of us feel that the [...]

Emma Byers2024-03-13T19:35:11+00:0015 March 2024|Categories: Habit formation, Procrastination|Tags: creating habits that stick, habits, habits that last, hard on yourself, healthy habits, holistic life coaching, how to get things done, motivitation, perfectionism, positive feedback, positive feedback loop, procrastinating, Procrastination, productivity tools, trauma-informed coaching, welcoming change|Comments Off

Is it just me?
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Is it just me?

Attachment theory, avoidant attachment, Self confidence

Is it just me?

I adore my clients and am fascinated by their lives, their stories, their dreams and ambitions. And, of course, they are all wonderfully unique. But you'd be amazed by how similar the themes are in our coaching sessions. Topics that I bang on here regularly, like: being stressed, frazzled and trapped on a hamster wheel never feeling good enough being stuck, procrastinating and spinning on the spot being the "imposter", about to be caught out at any minute negative [...]

Emma Byers2023-05-15T13:34:44+00:0015 May 2023|Categories: Attachment theory, avoidant attachment, Self confidence|Tags: being unkind to self, broken, emotional health, healing trauma, imposter syndrome, is it just me?, never enough, not good enough, people pleasing, perfectionism, polyvagal theory, procrastinating, Procrastination, self sabotage, self-care, spinning on the spot, stuck, trauma-informed coaching|Comments Off

Battling Perfectionism – When Enough is Enough!
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Battling Perfectionism – When Enough is Enough!

Perfectionism, Procrastination

Battling Perfectionism – When Enough is Enough!

The battle with "enough" is a regular one for my clients - the eager entrepreneurs, the diligent employees, and those more comfortable with being hard on themselves than cheering themselves on. And wow, it's a huge topic - definitely one for all of us struggling with perfectionism (though I now class myself as an "almost" recovered perfectionist). So I'm sure I'll return to it again in these blogs, but let's make a start here: How to know when [...]

Emma Byers2022-07-16T07:24:40+00:0017 June 2022|Categories: Perfectionism, Procrastination|Tags: beat overwhelm, beat procrastination, enough is enough, get it out there, get stuff done, imperfect works, improvement, minimum viable product, perfectionism, Procrastination, putting things off, start then improve, stop procrastinating, you are enough, you are good enough|Comments Off

Is Perfectionism a Problem? (#2 Perfectionism Series)

Am I A Perfectionist? (#1 Perfectionism Series)

Overcoming all-or-nothing thinking

Nourish or Numb?

Building Healthy Habits That Last: #3 Try Compassion Instead

Is it just me?

Battling Perfectionism – When Enough is Enough!

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